Guest Blogger: Carla Griscti ‘How to Embrace Your Quarter Life Crisis Positively’

Feeling the strain of the daily grind? Whether you’re panicking about stepping onto the property ladder or tired of dating around and desperate to find ‘the one’, if you’re in the midst of a quarter-life crisis, you’re absolutely not alone. Here’s how to embrace the uncertain chaos and deal with your crisis head on… With rising house prices, piling work pressures and the added worry you might wind up a childless spinster at the grand old age of 35, more and more women are facing uncertainty at some stage of their adult life. London is filled with young people in the midst of a quarter-life crisis or crises (if you’re lucky you’ll escape with only one, although the likelihood is you’ll be faced with many). I had my first ‘mini-crisis’ in my late teens when I was battling with which university I should attend. Three unis and a hideous break-up later, I found the right city, course and finally – much to my dad’s frustration – stuck at it. Thank God for student loans. My second crisis landed when I realised making it as a journalist was much harder than I initially thought. Particularly when you’re faced with extortionate living prices in London. Why oh why did I not pursue a career in finance? The third has been lingering for the last few years, so I think it’s safe to say I’ve officially entered ‘full crisis’ mode. The solution? To pack my bags and embark on a three-month trip to Australia. The only logical solution to get over yet another disastrous boy debacle.It’s okay to have a meltdown…But my point is, these meltdowns are completely normal and part of how you deal with the pressures of adult life. Whether you’re 25, 35 or 45, at some point we’ll all be faced with a crossroad in our lives. Be it work, relationships, money; the positive outcome for feeling anxious or unsettled is that it forces us to reevaluate our current situations, and if needs be, make bold changes for the better.LinkedIn recently reported that 72% of 25-33-year-olds have experienced a quarter-life crisis, with the majority experiencing their existential meltdown at 27. I think many of us can relate to this. You’re three years away from 30 and supposedly a fully-functioning adult. You might find yourself in a dead-end relationship you know you should ditch, a desire to completely change careers, or indulge in that round-the-world trip you’ve always dreamed of. It’s a poignant time, and one where most women make the transition albeit an awkwardly bumpy one – into real adulthood, battling with leaving their past, care-free versions of themselves behind. According to LinkedIn’s research, one of the biggest and most common pressures facing young professionals is getting on the property ladder – no surprise there; property prices are extortionate enough to leave many of us waiting in hope of winning the lottery. Unsurprisingly, the biggest anxiety for young women is feeling unsure what they should do next – both in their careers and their personal lives – closely followed by frustrations about career options, and not earning enough. Unlike a midlife crisis which comes from feelings of boredom and regret a general longing for things you never got round to doing when you were younger –a quarter-life crisis is concern and worry over all the things you do not yet have. At 27, a sordid affair or an indulgent sports car is probably not going to help matters. You might still be single, and you probably couldn’t afford one anyway it’s hard enough budgeting for the monthly tube fare, let alone a soft top convertible. It’s never too late to change your mind… Career frustrations and money worries are real; at 35 I’ve lived through my fair share of overdrafts and career meltdowns. What I’ve learnt is that no matter what age you are, you can always change your mind. If something is making you unhappy, you have the power to change it. A dear friend studied and worked as a solicitor for almost 10 years in London, and at 30, after tragically losing her boyfriend to cancer, she decided to up sticks and move to Australia. There’s no denying it was challenging, but she’s now changed careers, her social circle and her entire life. She spends most mornings surfing on Bondi beach and couldn’t be happier. I’m in complete adoration of her strength, determination and most importantly her positivity.Don’t feel pressured by societal norms. You make your own destiny, and you decide what you want to become. Your life is a canvas waiting to be painted and that’s exciting, scary, frightening and liberating all at the same time. You might not have a savings account, mortgage, husband or kids, but the most exciting things are yet to come. Don’t miss out on the here and now by wasting time panicking about your future. Some things are out of your control. If you don’t have enough money to buy a house, then what’s the point in worrying about it now? At some stage in your life, you’ll be in a much more stable position, so embrace the time you have now to make positive changes that make you happy and content. It’s only a crisis if you allow it to be… If you regret never having travelled, then embrace the travelling bug. If you want to move abroad, start researching countries that could make it a reality. If you’re single and worried you’ll be left on the shelf, take your dating destiny into your own hands
It’s only a crisis if you allow it to be. A crisis by definition is when a difficult decision has to be made, so see it as a turning point and shed yourself of any unwanted baggage. When you do reach that confusing crossroad, you have the liberty and free will to choose a different path. Society wants you to feel anxious that you don’t have a house or a healthy savings account; it wants you to spend every penny you earn so that you work to buy more. But ask yourself one question: does any of this really make you happy? My advice? Stick two fingers up at capitalism, go against societal constructs and dream big. You can be whoever you want to be and go anywhere you want to go. Your life is all about facing hardships and making positive changes, and your crisis a ticket to your next great adventure. This blog was first posted on Sheerluxe.com when the author used to work there. You can find the original post HERE